Well Okay Then

It seems former NBA'er and general world traveller/raconteur Paul Shirley wants to add advice columnist to his list of achievements, how else can we explain this essay on FlipCollective?

"Dear Haitians –

First of all, kudos on developing the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere. Your commitment to human rights, infrastructure, and birth control should be applauded.

As we prepare to assist you in this difficult time, a polite request: If it's possible, could you not re-build your island home in the image of its predecessor? Could you not resort to the creation of flimsy shanty- and shack-towns? And could some of you maybe use a condom once in a while?

Sincerely,

The Rest of the World"

Now, nobody enjoys a heartfelt "pick yourself up by the bootstraps" motivational speech more than me but I'm not sure I'd have the chutzpah to fire it up to a nation that is busy bulldozing at least 150,000 people into a mass grave.

Before we rightfully cast Mr. Shirley into public oblivion though, it should be noted that some of the points he made had merit.

1. Haiti was a mess before the earthquake. Fair point.
2. Sending them billions of dollars to reconstruct that same mess is idiotic. Very true.
3. Poor nations create a poverty cycle by having an accelerated birth rate due to lack of education and birth control. Very true, we see it in Africa all the time.

These facts are all very true. Had Paul decided to make these sociological observations in some kind of reflective brainstorming session on how to proceed constructively, perhaps something could have been made by them. By contextualizing them in one big "F@*! You!" love letter to the dead/dying people of Haiti and their supporters, I suspect this will become Shirley's version of John Rockers famous "Queer With Aids, Puerto Rican with 5 Kids" subway speech.

I guess he doesn't get to be the next Dan Majerle or the next Chuck Klosterman. Time to fire up plan C chief.

Is it November Yet?

Barak Obama's Carnival of the Damned continued to spin today as two relevant news items emerged from Washington. Most of the debate focused on which point of interest was most ridiculous. Hard to tell.

First, Obama broke out his new (phony) populist message that we can all be sure to get an earful of before the State of the Union address next week. His big plan to bring a sense of fiscal responsibility to the national government is to announce a freeze on all non-military discretionary spending. Boy that sounds great but what does it really mean?

Well it means that the billions we are spending on the military will not be changed, the stimulus package spending will not be changed, our massive entitlement programs will continue on unchanged and the smallest part of our government's budget, discretionary spending, will be frozen at the record breaking high levels they jumped to in 2009. Doesn't really sound like this will generate any actual savings and will in fact guarantee we go further into debt. This is a remarkable thing because usually liberals try and label deficit reducing measures as budget cuts when they are really just reductions in the rate of increase. Obama isn't even trying to be a smooth political operative anymore, he's now a political date rapist.

Second, we get word that Obama, Pelosi and Reid are going to try and get the full monty on healthcare by passing the Senate bill along with a promise by the Senate to add the socialist stuff in later. Now it isn't surprising that these Lenin wannabes are going to try and pull this risky, probably unconstitutional move. The surprise is that they are going to the mattresses for this crappy bill. As it stands now, the Senate bill is an abomination that screws the private sector, taxpayers and people without healthcare. It's just a hodgepodge of various bribes to constituent groups and unions that won't even guarantee bad coverage to people without. If they get all there wished thrown in later, it's still a bad bill. All of the bribes are still there, the private sector gets even more screwed, people with healthcare will be forced along with people without coverage into a public option that is ill conceived and destined to fail and cause prices to skyrocket which will cause the rationing and denial of coverage. It's a capitalist nightmare, it's a socialist nightmare, it's even a nightmare to those socialist democrats over in Western Europe and the dead red Chi-coms.

This bill cannot claim to hold to any set of ideological tenants. If the main goal is just to find a massive bill to bribe party loyalists, isn't there an easier way to do it than by outraging the public while doing so? Hell, the entire stimulus bill was one big, flexible ATM for liberal activists, why not just use that? This just proves what political and intellectual lightweights the Democratic leadership currently is. The have no real tact or skill for the issues or the public, they just chase leftist agenda's for the same reason dogs bury bones, pure dumb instinct. It's now apparent that no matter what happens in the news, polling, elections, etc. that they are just going to beat this thing until Congress caves in or the public does. I hope they manage to string this out all the way until November, the possibility for political carnage that is developing is a rare occurrence and I want to see just how much damage this mushroom cloud of stupidity can generate.

Beantown Beatdown in the Bay State

I must admit, I never once thought I'd see a Republican Senator in Massachusetts for the duration of my life. I kept that whimsical fantasy right next to my dreams of the Raiders winning the Super Bowl and scientists proclaiming cigar smoke, scotch, prime rib and copious amounts of sex to be the magic elixir for never eroding health.

Thanks to Scott Brown and the corpse of Martha Coakley, I can now check one of those bad boys of the list!

Even as the polls showed Brown gaining all the momentum, it was hard to feel good about it because if the Dems had decided to bite the unpleasant Coakley bullet and head to the polls, Brown would have been toast.

I could never contemplate a scenario where a significant number of Democrats would go to the booth and pulled the lever for a Republican. It's insane to think about but it seems to have happened and Scott Brown bashed her to the tune of 52-47.

That's an incredibly large margin considering the State and the voter registration disparity. All of those early charges of possible voter fraud and lawyers heading to Boston seem foolish in hindsight. Like a State that's 90% liberal could somehow be rigged by a conservative anyway.

Besides Coakley, the real loser is the Democratic Congress. They couldn't get anything passed with a filibuster proof majority in both houses. Tonight's result has put them in a hell of a bind. If they ram through legislation right now, they are actively defying the will of the people by not waiting for Brown to be seated. If they wait for Brown, he'll vote against it and the fragile coalition will fall apart as Reid looks for that elusive 60th vote. You can sure as hell bet that the so called Blue Dogs (I call them Red Cowards but whatever) Lincoln, Lieberman, Bayh, Landrieu and Nelson are now officially terrified. They may be looking for anyway out of this mess. In the House, Pelosi has indicated she's going to be even more hard line and leftist. She is completely nuts so her kamikaze dive to the far left might be too much for the skittish Senate and suddenly very vulnerable House libs to take. You might see a whole bunch of Representatives start withdrawing their votes based on crap issues like the cost or Stupak amendment. None of them care about those things but the do make a convenient excuse to back out.

Regardless of the long term outcome, tonight was a momentous occasion. One of those rare political nights where even the casual observer stands up to take notice of the fact that the people have decided to make a statement and a loud one at that.

I myself am just happy that the scientists can now get back to my list.




(photo from WashingtonPost.com)

That Chowder Stinks

I cannot even begin to fathom how Martha Coakley got the donkey nod in the Massachusetts (spell check works!) special election to replace the Great Submariner Ted Kennedy.

I figure she either sacrificed a prostitute, Jennifer's Body style, somewhere out in the Chesapeake Bay or that the Bay State has finally run out of competent socialists to run for public office.

Given the fact that Harvard is still there indoctrinating young minds I can only suggest that the State police warm up the barges and start dredging that Bay.

Seriously, how can somebody so politically (and maybe literally) stupid win a primary? Did she actually run against Ted Kennedy? Consider these whoppers:

-She watched her own political stooge rough up a reporter. Her response? Didn't see it.
-She misspelled Massachusetts, MassachusettEs, in her own campaign ad.
-She showed her elitist attitude by deriding Scott Brown for going to Fenway to shake hands with the hockey fans who showed up for the winter classic. You would have thought she was asked to give sponge baths to lepers the way she reacted to the idea of going to Fenway.
-She explained her fund raising in DC by explaining that it was a special election so she didn't have time time to actually talk to the people, only to hang out with special interests in the hope that they can turn out the vote.
-She was obliterated in the one debate she agreed to participate in after stonewalling for weeks.
-And just for fun, she tossed aside Curt Shillings criticism's of her by dismissing him as "another Yankees fan" (like Rudy Guiliani). When corrected about his history she says "Well he's not here anymore. Lets watch some tape just for fun:

Martha Coakley


Awesome. Truly.

If the liberal movement is in such bad shape that this is the best they can do in Mass. then I am very hopeful for the future. On to California!

Hick to the Sticks

Well, it' finally official. Ed Perlmutter is still the State's most boring politician.

Whoops! I mean John Hickenlooper has decided to run for governor and I must say, the liberal conclaves in Denver and Boulder are absolutely having hot flashes over it. Which is precisely the problem for Democrats.

Hick is absolutely adored by the San Franciscoesque liberals in Denver and some of it's surrounding areas. Why? Because he's every bit the kooky leftist that Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid and the rest of their ilk are. This is awesome if you're running for Mayor of Denver.

Not so good for a statewide election though. While there are a number of liberals scattered around the rest of the State, notably around Pueblo and Ft. Collins, but the similarities end there. The liberals in those areas are more in the Reagan Democrat mold. Sure they favor more aggressive government spending programs then a typical conservative but they still believe in some measure of fiscal responsibility, social conservatism and individualism. These are the Blue Dog types that have been sharply opposed to Speaker Pelosi.

Proof of this comes in the Reps for the third and fourth districts, John Salazar and Betsy Marky. Both of these two try and pass themselves off as moderates but they vote as liberally as any other lib when they need too. In an effort to deceive their constituents, these reps consistently wait until the end of votes in the House. If it is a blowout, Pelosi allows them to vote conservative to placate the voters but if it's close they vote party line. Marky especially gets the kid glove treatment from Pelosi since she won her seat only because Marilyn Musgrave became so detestable that she blew and easily winnable Republican seat.

So who benefits from Hicks involvement? GOP candidate Scott McInnis. Grand Junctions own and former 3rd dist. representative led Hick 45-42 in the first poll taken for the matchup. He has far more connection to rural/southern/western Colorado and has cleared the field to avoid a messy primary. He'll get what conservative vote there is in the Denver area because he's not a radical right winger and if you combine that with Hicks total lack of appeal to any voter south of Invesco or west of Aspen along with a devastating difference in voter enthusiasm between Republicans and Democrats and you should see McInnis as the next governor of Colorado. It will be hard for Hick to counteract these factors as nobody is clamoring for Denver style governing outside Denver and he appeals to no minority or youth base to make up for the nationwide lack of liberal enthusiasm. Dems in 2008 rode a big wave of minority and youth support to destroy Republicans but Hick can forget that. Ken Salazar would have been far more formidable as his ties to the Hispanic community could have increased voter turnout enough to swing the election. Something tells me Mexicans, etc. aren't going to flock to the pols for a geeky looking white liberal named Hickenlooper with the same fervor.

ALCOA Presents!

You Make The Call!

In box number one you have a substance of moderate value and limited application! In box number two you have 297 pounds of pure, lazy crap! Oakland Raiders, You Make The CALL!

This is essentially what it has come down to in Raiderland. The choice Lord Al seems to be weighing between keeping either coach Tom Cable or rumored NFL quarterback JaMarcus Russell. This is like Sophie's choice except that one of the kids is adopted, lazy and disliked by the vast majority of the people with any rooting interest.

Now I'm not here to serve out the Tom Cable kool-aid, he's average at best. However, for all of his limitations, the players do seem to play hard for him, even when the season was essentially over. Roll some tape of the Joe Bugel, Mike White, Bill Callahan, Art Shell II, Norv Turner, Lane Kiffen eras and see if you can say the same.

Now to JaMarcus. He is just plain awful. Ryan Leaf was a better player, just had a worse personality. Russell is arguably worse now than when he came in the league. Still fat, no pocket awareness, no touch, no timing, no leadership. When asked how he felt about Bruce Gradkowski getting a chance to start, I think his exact quote was "Pretty great!" I doubt Dan Marino would let Scott Mitchell take over so easily.

Gradkowski really was the nail in the JaMarcus coffin. Gradkowski has all the skills of a career backup yet the team was transformed when he played. the offense looked competent and confident. Even Charlie Frye rolled up big passing yards when he got his chance. When both went down with injuries, the team deflated visibly, turnovers ensued and patheticness resumed.

There can be no choice in the matter. Cut Jam-Jam. He will never be any good. Draft an OL with the eighth pick (Claussen and Bradford are scary thoughts), draft a Tony Pike in the second or third round and roll into next year with J.P. Losman and Gradkowski fighting it out for the job. If the team sucks again, fire Cable and try to land Jake Locker in the draft. Doesn't really matter what the plan is so long as JaM isn't a part of it.

Rocky Mountain Hysteria

Boy, I haven't seen Colorado liberals this excited since Obama extended unemployment benefits a few more weeks. I understood the joy over that, if I was a goldbricker I'd be stoked too about four more weeks of doin nothin. Not sure I follow the ecstasy here though.

Having your very liberal incumbent Governor quit mid reelection? Bad. That he did so to "spend more time with his family" (stop fooling around on his wife)? Bad. Possible replacements? Lets see.

The crowd favorite seems to be Alamosa's own, Interior Secretary Ken Salazar, former CO senator and brother of 3rd district Rep. John Salazar. The leftist blogosphere has applied mythical status to his popularity in Colorado. A casual sampling of these fine folks commenting on the subject seem to think that in a race against Scott McInnis, Salazar would get between 59 and 71 percent of the vote. It's true the man was popular when he got elected to the Senate. All Democrats were at the time. Now Salazar hasn't got the benefit of running on the wave of anti-Bush sentiment. Now he is tainted with the stink of Obama and all of the failures associated with that administration. That will be a huge anchor for him in a statewide election that has turned against Obama, outside of Boulder and some of Denver anyway. Besides, all the bad things Ritter did policy wise are no different than what Salazar would have done as well. McInnis has a realistic chance to take down Salazar should that be the matchup. Also an odd showdown between politicians from small, western slope Colorado, McInnis based in Grand Junction, Salazar in Alamosa/Pueblo.

The best thing about Salazar running would be the fact that Denver Mayor John Hickenlooper wouldn't be. He is incredibly popular in Denver and should have replaced Salazar in the Senate instead of Bennett. I'm not convinced McInnis could have taken him down so hopefully he stays out.

Other candidates. Jared Polis - Please. His own party hates him, he's just rich enough to hold onto his socialist seat up in Boulder. Ed Perlmutter - No way, not enough name recognition, record or money. He gets obliterated. Andrew Romanoff - Who knows. He says he's staying in the Senate race but has he even really campaigned yet? People were very excited about him when he launched his bid but he has been invisible since then. Probably not viable.

The primary in both parties should be entertaining as well. McInnis got rid of Penry but still has to get by Maes, a tea party favorite. It seems likely that there will be at least two Democrats in the primary election as I doubt the liberal bench just wants to anoint Salazar the savior just yet.

Political Pu Pu Platter

Busy day in our nations capital and surrounding areas. Some quick hits.

A poll came out today showing Massachusetts Republican Scott Brown trailing Coakley by a mere 9 points, down from 30 a few weeks ago. While it's still way to wide a gap to call the race competitive, it's a good sign for Republicans. The big number to take away from the poll is that Brown is destroying Coakley 65-21 with independents, the only way a Republican can win in this state. Special elections are always weird but for Ted Kennedy's old seat to turn red the year a healthcare bill passes the House and Senate is a enticing possibility.

From one liberal hot spot to another, New York. It seems Rep. Peter King is reopening the possibility of running for Senate against uber dud Kristen Gillibrand. There hasn't been any polling on this matchup so it's hard to know what changed his mind. Maybe it's just the national attitude going the conservative way or Rudy dropping out but my guess is King is seeing some internal polling showing him able to take out both Pataki and Gillibrand. Either that or King got hint of a rumor that Pataki would also drop out. Who knows but the Senate would be better of with King.

Nice of Byron Dorgan to read the tea leaves and fall on his sword gracefully. Perhaps you North Dakotans can finally rectify the mess you've been sending to the Senate? Thanks!

Ah yes, my beloved Colorado how interesting you have become. It appears Gov. Ritter will be withdrawing from his reelection campaign, possibly for nominating some chick he might have nailing on the side to be the state's top prosecutor. Oh yeah, she was also caught illegally accessing a database on a child rapist Ritter cut a deal with. There is an 11 am press conference so I'll assume it's true. Question is, what do libs do? Does Denver Mayor Hickenloper give up a guaranteed job for a very tight contest against Scott McInnis in a conservative year? He's popular but turned down a similar chance in 2006. Maybe Senate enigma Andrew Romanoff gives up trying to beat Michael Bennett in a primary, assuming he was still trying, and goes for this state's top spot. One thing is or sure, this isn't good for Bennett. He's a Ritter lackey who should never have been appointed to the Senate. The people might just be more resigned to toss him out if his meal ticket has to leave in disgrace after admitting to adulterous behavior and improper hiring practices. Republicans shouldn't be too giddy though, liberals couldn't stand Ritter either so this might actually make for a closer race than if Ritter had stayed in.

As Legit As A Commie Election

Despite the best efforts of College Football's Politburo to eliminate competition in favor of voting for winners via a biased minority, an actual football game with meaning broke out tonight.

The Fiesta Bowl, now known as American Bowl, squared unbeaten TCU against unbeaten Boise State. The fact that Boise State won a pretty exciting, well played, albeit low scoring game is essentially irrelevant. The important part was that this wast he game that the BCS had shoved down it's throat by the public (and governmental) outcry over its anti-competitive and anti-American exclusive and subjective method of champion determination. Without the pressure from the public this game would have been another crappy matchup between second tier BCS league also rans like Pitt, VT or LSU. Anybody who thinks we need more power conference representation, I encourage you to watch some tape of Florida/Cincinnati or Oregon/Ohio State. Just wait for the Iowa/Georgia Tech crapfest and then you can add that tape to the pile.

But for one night rejoice! America has a legitimate champion, the 14-0 Broncos of Boise State. Rather than have our champion determined by the vote of a bunch of regionally bias/incompetent voters, we can all rest easy that the real champ was decided on the field of play as it should be. Alabama or Texas might get that ridiculous glass egg but it's a cheap victory built on a fraud, better to relish a real team instead.

Dignified

Wow, it's hard to tell who was the biggest flatline on this final Sunday of the NFL regular season, Denver or Cincinnati.

On the one hand, the Bengals were completely dominated by a craptastic, although playoff bound, Jets. On the other, the Broncos were demolished by an even suckier Chiefs team.

Decisions, decisions.

I guess the dubious honor of crappiest performance would have to go to Denver. When their game was being played, they were simply a win and either a loss by the Ravens or jets and they would be in. They played like the Cleveland Browns in a summer scrimmage. You have to seriously wonder about child genius McDaniels coaching ability after blowing a six-0 start and choking away the playoffs in Oakland and Kansas City. Who could have figured that Kyle Orton wouldn't be the teams biggest problem this year?

None of that excuses the horrid Bengals. Somebody should remind them that they aren't just playing out the string of another losing season. Not only did their incompetence almost guarantee a one-and-done playoff appearance for the Queen City, it subjected America to another crappy Jets game. Had the Bengals actually won, we would all be treated to the high flying, semi-insane Houston Texans. Nope, hope everyone likes the Sanchize and more Shonn Greene.